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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29130927">I can think of one thousand places much worse than this</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PryingBlackbird/pseuds/PryingBlackbird'>PryingBlackbird</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Critical Role (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>After-Action-Patch-Up, Blood and Injury, Empire-Siblings, Found Family, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode 123, Spoilers Episode 123</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:34:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,038</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29130927</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PryingBlackbird/pseuds/PryingBlackbird</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This takes place after the events of C2E123</p><p>Separated from the rest of the group Beau and Caleb spend some hours alone in the dome, comforting each other and talking about their feelings regarding the most recent events. </p><p>(I mainly wanted an excuse to have the empire siblings alone for a while. I love them so much.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Beauregard Lionett &amp; Caleb Widogast</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>62</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I can think of one thousand places much worse than this</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>The Title is from “I am here” by Pink, found on Beauregard’s first official playlist.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>They run.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They run until their spells stop working, until an owl drops out of the sky turning into a blue tiefling cleric, and a mammoth collapses into the snow turning into a beaten and bloodied human monk. They all help each other up, and keep on dragging through the snow, heading south east. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They don’t dare to stop to tend to their wounded. There is a pressing urge to just get away, away, away, and as long as they are moving there is something to focus on, something other than the fear and the pain and the biting cold. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After some time they reach a slope, realizing too late how steep it is and start sliding down in the darkness. Caleb, who has been supporting Beau, is clinging to her while they are going down and suddenly they feel weightless. He loses his grip on her. And even deeper darkness envelopes him and he is falling. Something sharp cuts his shoulder when he slams into it, plummeting down. Instinctively he throws a feather, casts blindly into the darkness, hoping to also catch Beau with the spell. He slows, gently floating down. A wave of his hand produces a globule of light above them. Below him Beau has landed on a small ledge and he manages to land next to her. Below them is only darkness.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Looking up he sees the chasm that has swallowed them. Frozen walls left and right, forming a rift in the eternal ice. Chunks of frozen snow and ice are still raining down where the snow cover had masked the treacherous cleft, before giving way under their weight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The ledger seems firm enough to carry them both and behind it a small cave has formed in the ice. It is oddly quiet down here. Beau lies on her stomach and doesn’t move. Panic grips his heart, he shakes her and calls her name, eventually turning her around onto her back when there is no response. She is bleeding from a nasty cut on her forehead. Her eyes are closed, her face is blood crusted and her breath is faint. He frantically searches his satchel, producing a healing potion and pours it carefully into her mouth. For a moment nothing happens but then she coughs and slowly opens her eyes. “Caleb.” she whispers. The little smile that forms around her lips when he recognizes him sends a painful jolt through his heart. She is shaking from the cold and he notices that he is as well. Now that they aren’t running anymore their sweat and blood drenched clothes become a problem.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sends a globule of light into the small cave next to them. The ground is a bit uneven but it will work. “In here.” he says, trying to help Beau up but her legs don’t carry her and in the end she just drags herself across the floor into the opening and then simply collapses again, leaving a trail of blood behind her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He slaps his spellbook on the ground and begins to cast the dome. “Stay with me Beauregard.” he mutters drawing invisible arcane sigils onto the frozen ground with a shaking hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly a voice pops into his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Caleb! Can you hear me? Are you alright? Where are you? We lost you and Beau! Are you dead? Is Beau with you? We are...</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The message cuts off. Jester sounds desperate. He takes a moment to carefully phrase his response. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Fell into a crevasse, found a cave. Creating the dome now. Beau is alive. Will rest and then fly us out. Go to safety. Please.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There is no further reply. He assumes she ran out of spells. Hopefully they will go on without them, find shelter and not try to rescue them in the dark, gambling away advance they gained on their pursuers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally the dome springs into existence around them and the temperature rises significantly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Relieved Caleb shrugs out of his coat, flattening it out on the frozen ground to create a barrier against the ice. Beau is shaking more violently now. “Come now.” he says, grabbing her shoulders. “Lie down over here so you don’t freeze to death.” With his help she manages to roll over onto his coat. There is dim light in the dome and he brings in his globules to see her better. Her face is a mess of frozen and dried blood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Caleb.” she whispers again. “What the fuck happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We fell into a crevasse. It’s fine, we’re safe. The others are still on the surface, I told them to go to safety. We will rest here.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looks terrible and he has to bite back a curse. For all his magic, there is nothing he can do to heal her. He gave her his last healing potion, but it did little more than wake her up and stop the bleeding from her forehead. It is very obvious that she is in pain. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He snaps his fingers and his cat appears next to him. “Be a good cat and get me some ice.” he tells him and watches him leave the dome. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They need water, but his waterskin is in the bag of holding. They usually put all of their water in there, to prevent it from freezing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A moment later Frumpkin returns, pushing pieces of frozen snow and ice into the dome. He puts them in a cup he retrieved from his satchel and melts them with a bit of fire that gathers in his palm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Here drink this.” he passes the cup to Beau, who gets up on one elbow and downs the water in one big gulp. He melts more ice, drinking the water himself this time and then continues to get enough water to rinse a piece of cloth from his satchel. He hands it to Beau and she starts to wipe the blood of her face. Her hands are shaking and he wants to help her, but knows that she would not want him to. “I’m not a child Widogast.” she would say, slapping his hand away. So instead he just watches her, the image of Lucien grabbing her throat still vivid in his mind. The desperation when his magic failed him and all he could do was watch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You almost got yourself killed tonight Beauregard.” He says, barely managing to sound casual. There is a little tremble in his voice, and a furrow between his brows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know…” Beau mumbles, wiping the blood away from her cheeks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was reckless to go back into that fight after you almost died.” There is suppressed anger in his tone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know.” her voice is even quieter now, as she wipes dried blood out of her ears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can’t afford to lose you.” More anger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know.” a hint of frustration. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> can’t afford to lose you.” This time it sounds pleading and desperate. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blood soaked cloth falls to the floor as Beau reaches up to rub her temples. She is lying on her back again, eyes squeezed shut. “I KNOW!” she winces as her own yell sends a jolt of hot white pain through her already throbbing skull. “I know Caleb, gods dammit. We all almost died today, what was I supposed to DO? Fuck!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Silence falls in the dome. Frumpkin climbs on Caleb’s lab and he absentmindedly strokes his fur. For a while purring is the only sound in their shelter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a while Beau manages to sit up, the water helped as well as getting out of the cold. Her whole body hurts. She looks over at Caleb, frowning when she sees the state he is in. “Come over here and take off your shirt.” she commands him and he raises an eyebrow. “You’re bleeding.” she adds. So he obliges. No point in arguing with her over this.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The shirt is sticking to his skin, soaked with dried blood and when he rips it off carelessly the cuts start to bleed again in places. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Careful you idiot!” she scolds.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There is a nasty bruise stretching all across his torso, from the hit of the dragon tail. It has already faded to yellow, thanks to the healing magic of their clerics, but it still hurts. He also has sustained several cuts from Tyffial’s blade. Beau carefully cleans away the blood, her gaze lingering on the red eye on Caleb’s shoulder for a moment. Like the red eyes that stared at her when...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then she hugs him, pulling him close and after a moment he returns it. Holding on as if their life depends on it. And maybe it does. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hope the others are alright…” she says into the silence after a while, her words are muffled. Caleb tries to sound confident, but his arms around her tense. “I’m sure they are, they can take care of themselves.” And then they just hold each other for a while.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have to kill him.” Beau says eventually. She sounds sad. Caleb slowly gets out of the hug, holding her at arm's length, searching for something in her eyes. When they first met he wouldn’t meet anyone's gaze, now he effortlessly holds eye contact with her. Prying, assessing. Tears are staining her face, mirroring the wet streaks on his own. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her voice is shaking. “I don’t think we can get him back. His eyes… There was nothing of Molly in those eyes.” Slowly he nods. “I’m afraid you’re right Beauregard. I saw it too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There is nothing more to say.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Later they lie together on the ground in an angle, Caleb’s head resting on Beau’s stomach while she slowly strokes his hair. They are used to sleeping cramped together in the dome and it feels too big and too empty without the others, so they seek a physical connection, although there would be more than enough space to sleep apart. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb sounds sleepy when he suddenly asks “Do you love her?” There is an audible smile in her voice when she replies. “I do.” “You should tell her you know. Before it is too late.” there is a hint of regret in his voice. She is silent for a while. “I guess I really should…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And eventually, deep down below the eternal ice of Eiselcross, exhausted and beaten the Wizard and the Expositor drift off into sleep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they finally have rested enough for him to replenish his magic and for Beau to reclaim some of her strength it’s already afternoon. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There is no message from Jester, but it’s possible they pressed on for a while longer, before being able to rest which would mean she doesn’t have her spells back yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb casts fly on both of them and they ascend from the crevasse into the crisp air of Eiselcross, rising from the dark and frozen depths into the bright blinding sunlight. There are no clouds in the sky and the sun is already close to the horizon. The snow has mostly obscured the footprints of their friends at the bottom of the slope, but it should be easy enough to track them from the air. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He raises his hands, beginning to weave his spell.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey Caleb.” she interrupts him, reaches for his hand, squeezes it for a moment. “Yes Beauregard?” Their eyes meet. There is a deep understanding between them and it is something they cherish, something they never had before in their life, something they can’t afford to lose. She opens her mouth as if to say something, but then just gives him a little smile and let’s go of his hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Caleb finishes his spell and a moment later a giant eagle rises into the air, carrying Beau on his back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment she allows herself to marvel at the beauty of this strange place, the endless white landscape, the ragged rock formations piercing it like scattered teeth. The gaping crevice that had swallowed them the night before. And the feeling of leaving it all behind below them, watching it grow smaller and smaller. The adrenaline of flying.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Neither of them knows what is waiting for them. There is only one thing that is certain. They will face it together until the very end. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. &lt;3 Kudos and comments always cheer me up.</p><p>I’m also always happy to chat about all things CR, find me on twitter or tumblr as @PryingBlackbird</p></blockquote></div></div>
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